Fill

I got my first fill today, injecting saline into my expanders. I was super anxious for it. It put me in a grumpy mood yesterday. She found the port with a cool magnet and marked the spot of the port. Then she stuck me. The right side was first and when the needle went in (through my skin, muscle, and into the port), it hurt. But the pain actually was shooting through my right arm, not in my breast. It felt like someone gave me a dead arm. And the pain didn't go away for a half hour or so. The reason I felt it in my arm is because those chest muscles are all interconnected with other nearby muscles. 

She slowly injected saline and I could feel my chest wall tighten. It didn't feel too uncomfortable at first. She said she would fill as much as I could tolerate (pain wise). It was basically up to me. I tried to relax and breath to determine when to have her stop. At one point I said to stop and she backed up and removed some saline. Then she injected it again. I guess it helps to stretch the muscle, then relieve it. We settled on 100ml of saline. I felt uncomfortable, but wasn't dying. And I knew the other side was still coming. She removed the needle and put a small bandaid on. I didn't watch any of the needle stuff. 

The left side wasn't so bad. I only felt pressure when the needle went in, and no arm pain. During my mastectomy surgery, she filled the expanders part way. But she ended up filling the left side more than the right because that side was tolerating it better. Because of that, the left side has been bigger for the past 3 weeks. So, today, she wanted to even things up. At surgery, the left side got 240ml and the right side got 180ml. Adding 100ml to the right side brought it to 280ml. So, she added 40ml to the left side today and was done. Now I'm not lopsided! From here on out we'll add evenly to each side. 

Here's my new dilemma. What size do I want to be?! My doctor asked me this today and I didn't really have a response. I've always just been the size I've been and haven't really thought much of it. I never planned to change that. She said to really pay attention to how my clothes fit and how comfortable I am at each size. The shape of implants is different, but the size will be comparable. Once I determine that I'm happy with the size (or I can't stand the thought of any more fills!), she will stop adding and I will continue to let my body heal. She likes to give the expanders 3ish months at desired size. Then we will schedule the exchange surgery, to take out the expanders and replace them with softer, permanent (10+ years) implants. This surgery will likely take place the end of August or beginning of September. That day can't come soon enough! The expanders are SO hard and uncomfortable. I felt a silicone implant in the office today and it felt so soft and nice. Can't wait for that.